It is all a conspiracy

So a while back I read this book about this girl who saved a little boy and was on the news and a few days latter someone contacted her saying she was their child and she had been kidnapped and sold by a baby broker.
This got me thinking.....do I look like my parents? Why am I so short, my parents aren't? And so the wheels started turning. I know I must be adopted, why haven't my parents told me? After a little bit I start feeling bad. My poor real parents out there looking for me, I bet they have never given up hope. They are probably posting my picture up in the streets of new york (because that where I was probably from). Crying themselves to sleep every night not knowing where their little girl is. And I want to reach out and say I AM HERE! But then there are the people I have called my parents since this illegal adoption. And I think what kind of people use a baby broker? Are Jill and Roger even their real names? What kind of trouble might they be in?
But then again, I am just as crazy as my mom, have the attitude of my father and fight with my sisters and brother enough to know that there is no way my parents aren't my parents. Plus there is that whole birth certificate thing and the pictures of me after I was born. Well maybe I am just being a little paranoid.

Kids Say the Funniest Things!

So I was having a BBQ with my family the other night when the topic of conversation turns to my relationship status. My dad started telling my sister and her husband about a guy he works with that he is "going" to set me up with. This is when I turn and say "I am not going on a date with him and stop trying to set me up". Of course, like I wasn't even there, they continued the conversation. Turns out my sister and her husband did know the guy and thought it would be a GREAT idea. That when I repeated the phrase " I am not going on a date with him.
Then my 7 year old nephew turns to me and says "why wont you go on a date with him"
I say "because I dont want to date him"
he says " well if your going to marry him you should probably date him first dont you think?
"I'm not going to marry him"
"why not"
"I dont need a husband"
"yes you do then you can have your own house and not live with grandma and grandpa"

I had know idea what to say. When your 7 year old nephew pretty much tells you you dont have a life, it kinda makes you realize just how bad you need to get stuff figured out!lol

ATF

So today I was thinking about the ATF and it just boggles me...... for numerous reasons. Lets start with, what is the ATF? Well the ATF is the Bureau of Alcohol, Tobacco, Firearms and Explosives. Answer me this, what the hell do they have in common? I mean I could understand the Alcohol and Tobacco, heck you can even put narcotics in with it. But firearms and explosives? I don't know about you, but when I go buy a pack of Cigarettes my next thought isn't "now where can I get some explosives?". Its just seems like they shouldn't go in the same category. What do you think?

Smother

When your the baby of the family there is alot of pressure. Not to be perfect, by any means, but to NOT screw up. But don't worry, there are people in the family to help you accomplish this task. You have your father.....who well lets just face it, no matter what you do you will always be his princess and he will try to fix whatever you screw up. Then there's your mother, she will tell you what you did wrong and how she "thinks" you should fix it. Then there is my personal favorite your SMOTHER. Now your Smother is not your mother, she is worse. She is the person that takes it upon herself to tell you how to live your life, what you might be doing wrong and how you WILL fix it. Your Smother is usually your oldest sister. In my house we just call her Tobi for short. Take for example last week. My mother asks me if I want to go to church, I say no. This is where my Smother steps in and persist to tell me that now that I no longer work on Sundays I do not have an excuse not to go to church so I WILL go. Hence the smother. So for all of you that have a SMOTHER, there are support groups! We will unite against the Smothers of the world!